Love Beyond Labels
Relationships come in many forms, and there's no single "right" way to love, connect, or commit.
What matters most is that all partners feel respected, valued, and heard. This guide explores
various relationship structures—from traditional monogamy to ethical non-monogamy—to help you
understand what might work best for you and your partners. Remember: the best relationship
structure is the one that honors everyone's needs, boundaries, and desires. 💕
💑
Monogamy
An exclusive romantic and sexual relationship between two people. This is the most
socially recognized relationship structure in many cultures.
Key Features:
- Emotional and sexual exclusivity
- Commitment to one partner
- Traditional social support
- Clear boundaries and expectations
Considerations:
- Requires ongoing communication about needs
- Both partners must agree on exclusivity
- Can evolve—discuss expectations regularly
- Jealousy management is still important
🌟
Ethical Non-Monogamy (ENM)
An umbrella term for relationships where partners consensually engage in romantic or
sexual connections with multiple people, with honesty and mutual agreement.
Key Features:
- Honesty and transparency are essential
- All partners know about other connections
- Consent from everyone involved
- Customizable to individual needs
Considerations:
- Requires excellent communication skills
- Time management can be challenging
- May face social stigma or misunderstanding
- Emotional labor and check-ins are crucial
💞
Polyamory
Having multiple romantic relationships simultaneously with the knowledge and consent
of all partners. Focuses on emotional connections, not just sexual.
Key Features:
- Multiple loving relationships
- Emphasis on emotional intimacy
- Can include various configurations (triads, quads, networks)
- All partners aware and consenting
Considerations:
- Complex scheduling and time commitment
- Requires strong emotional awareness
- Compersion (joy in partner's other connections) is valued
- Legal and social recognition challenges
🔓
Open Relationship
A committed relationship where partners agree to have sexual or romantic experiences
with others outside the primary relationship.
Key Features:
- Primary partnership with outside connections
- Agreed-upon rules and boundaries
- Can be sexual or romantic (or both)
- Flexibility in structure
Considerations:
- Clear boundaries must be established
- Regular check-ins about comfort levels
- STI prevention agreements needed
- Jealousy and insecurity may arise
🌀
Relationship Anarchy
A philosophy that rejects traditional relationship hierarchies and labels. Each
relationship is unique and defined by the people in it, not societal norms.
Key Features:
- No hierarchy between relationships
- Rejects labels like "primary" or "secondary"
- Each connection defined individually
- Emphasis on personal autonomy
Considerations:
- Can feel unstructured or confusing initially
- Requires exceptional self-awareness
- May challenge deeply held assumptions
- Not widely understood by mainstream culture
🦋
Solo Polyamory
Having multiple relationships while prioritizing personal autonomy and independence.
No desire for a "primary" partner or cohabitation.
Key Features:
- Maintains independence and autonomy
- No desire for cohabitation or enmeshment
- Multiple connections without hierarchy
- Self-partnered at core
Considerations:
- Partners may desire more commitment
- Requires clear communication about expectations
- May face misunderstanding ("commitment-phobic")
- Ideal for highly independent individuals
🎭
Swinging
Partners engage in sexual activities with others, often at parties or clubs. Typically
focuses on recreational sex rather than romantic connections.
Key Features:
- Sexual experiences with others
- Often done together as a couple
- Community and social events
- Emphasis on physical pleasure, not romance
Considerations:
- Both partners must be fully on board
- STI prevention is critical
- Rules about emotional involvement needed
- Community culture varies by location
💕
Monogamish
A mostly monogamous relationship with occasional exceptions. Partners are primarily
committed to each other but allow some outside connections under agreed conditions.
Key Features:
- Primarily monogamous with flexibility
- Specific rules about outside connections
- May be situational (travel, threesomes, etc.)
- Emphasis on primary partnership
Considerations:
- Clear boundaries are essential
- Both partners must agree on "exceptions"
- Can be a stepping stone to other structures
- Requires ongoing negotiation
🤐
Don't Ask, Don't Tell (DADT)
Partners agree they can have outside connections but don't share details. Prioritizes
privacy over transparency.
Key Features:
- Permission for outside connections
- Details are not discussed
- Emphasis on discretion
- Can reduce jealousy for some
Considerations:
- Can create emotional distance
- STI prevention agreements still crucial
- May lead to suspicion or mistrust
- Not ideal for everyone—requires trust
🤝
Platonic Partnerships
Deep, committed relationships without romantic or sexual components. Chosen family
structures that prioritize emotional intimacy and life partnership.
Key Features:
- Non-romantic, non-sexual commitment
- Deep emotional connection and support
- May include cohabitation or co-parenting
- Challenges the romance-centered model
Considerations:
- Often misunderstood or invisible
- Legal protections may be limited
- Ideal for aromantic or asexual individuals
- Requires clear agreements about commitment
💬 The Bottom Line
There is no "one size fits all" relationship structure. What works for one person
or partnership may not work for another—and that's completely okay! The most important factors
in any relationship structure are:
- Consent: All parties agree to the relationship structure
- Communication: Open, honest dialogue about needs and boundaries
- Respect: Everyone's feelings and boundaries are valued
- Flexibility: Relationships can evolve—what works today may change tomorrow
Click on any relationship card above to learn more! 🌈